Memories from a dream
by Mirajane Ryuu-Darkwings
Summary: What is the relation between hitsugaya toushiro and Ukitake juushiro? why does ukitake always give the boy candy? will the dreams explain? hitsugaya/ukitake FATHER/SON relationship.


i always wanted to write a story of this sort. i really liked a pic i saw, this fanfic is based on it ^^ hope you enjoy this

disclaimer: i do not own bleach.

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><p><em>"Would you like candy?"<em>

_"Uh huh! You know I love it daddy!"_

_"Daddy….why don't I have a mommy?"_

_"You do, she is just away, with the star, always watching you."_

_"Daddy…don't go, dad where are you going!"_

_"DADDY! WHAT DID YOU TO MY DADDY!"_

_"SHUT IT KID!…im going to enjoy killing you too….."_

Sweat rolls of his white brow, gradually making its way along the pale cheek to the white sheets. A pale hand grudgingly moves to land on tired eyes, still closed, still seeing the images that flashed through his mind. This dream…he kept having it for a while now, what did it mean? Who was the child…why was he screaming for his father…and why was _he _of all people seeing it? It was dream, yet it felt so real...

His hand rubbed one eye, which slowly opened to reveal a brown iris staring into the ceiling of his quarters. He could distantly hear the quarrel of Kiyone and Sentaro….first time in his life he wished they would just be quiet. His head was burning.

He slowly sat up and proceeded to get dressed.

The two third seats heard some rustle from their Capitan's room and both rushed to get him medicine and dinner.

He stared at the small tray they had brought. It made him smile for a while, but he felt it so wrong on his lips at that moment that it turned into a grimace. He pushed the tray away, food and drink untouched, medicine that Unohana had prepared, forgotten.

He needed some fresh air, he knew it always helped clear his mind, and Kami knew right now, that was all he wanted- to have a clear head again. It was evening, and he usually liked to have a stroll around Seireitei. Although this time it was needed.

"Taichou..where are you.."

"Out for a while. No need to be worried Kiyone"

"But…"

But he had already left.

It had started nearly a month ago, after the winter war had ended, he felt like it had something to do with that arrancar he fought, the little boy/demon. After that day he started to see these dreams. Always a boy's voice...too young to be even 10. Always the same questions the candy, the mother….and the yelling. But he never once saw them. Never. It was always in a black transparent place and the voices seemed to come from the walls…they were suffocating him.

He came to a halt near the 10th division. He could hear from the sakura tree he was near by the yells of the smallest taichou and his rather interesting fukutaichou.

He gave a small chuckle. So typical of Toushiro….

_I wonder if he eats the candy I give him…._

_Candy…_

He paused as a cough rocked his body.

_Ah, I had not taken the medicine…_

He stared at the blood that now coated his hand in slight wonder as he leaned on the tree. He had always had TB since he came to Soul Society. Maybe he was ill when he was alive?

A sudden dizziness made him stumble foreword, but before he could hit the trunk a small hand pulled him back.

"Ukitake taichou, are you all right?"

His eyes were closed but he needed no identification as to who the voice belonged too.

"Ah, Hitsugaya kun…no need to worry"

But the stubborn boy dragged him to his division where he promptly sat the older man on the couch.

Ukitake Juushirou sighed and leaned back, falling asleep while managing a small 'thank you'. The small capitan just smiled and went back to work, checking on the older man's condition every now and then. Seeing Ukitake hurt made him uneasy, he wanted the man to never be ill. He knew it was childish, but still….And the man never knew the reason why he accepted the candy…

He looked at the pile of paperwork in front of him and sighed. The nightwas going to be a long one,…and he still had not even slept. He was getting comfortable in his office before he saw Ukitake. His feet hurt, he had taken off both sandals and socks, plus the hayori was making his uncomfortable-sitting in It all night wasn't the best ideas. He changed into his pagamas, as he was planning to sleep after he finished att the damn paperwork but his plans went astray, as usual when it regarded Matsumoto's work. Very soon, his leaf green eyes grew heavy and his head fell on his folded arms, his breathing even. If Htsugaya Toushiro had stayed awake a bit longer, he would have noticed the sudden difference in the other white haired occupant of the room.

_"Would you like candy?"_

_"Uh huh! You know I love it daddy!"_

_"Daddy….why don't I have a mommy?"_

_"You do, she is just away, with the star, always watching you."_

_A child's laughter was heard all throughout the dark tunnel he was seeing. The voice was a bit muffled…it seemed the child was eating the candy._

_Then he saw it, two silhouettes outlined in the black nothingness that was taking the shape of a house…the style that was built many years ago..when he was alive._

_The bigger silhouette was laughing, holding hands with the smaller one. It was now that he realized how small the figure was. The child was no older then 5. This made hi sad for some reason, he felt a connection with him, wanted to protect him…_

_Wind blew through the black void, making the hair of the bigger shape drift with it. It was long, extremely long, like his own. Then the figure doubled over, pain racking his body, coming out in violent coughs._

_"Daddy! Daddy whats wrong.."_

_"Its nothing, don't worry, I am fine…" _

_The figure collapsed on the floor, breathing hard. The child was crying…until…_

_"There you are!" another voice, but Ukitake knew it, it was the voice of the killer…._

_The figure started to get up, taking the small child behind him, his hand preventing him from moving. The other figure approached. _

_Without warning the child was hurled in the air and slammed into the wall, and the father was left bleeding on the floor, a knife sticking out of his chest. The boy, hurt himself, ran to his father, hugging him._

_"I am leaving To..-"_

_"Daddy…don't go, dad where are you going!" the child was hysterically yelling now._

_"DADDY! WHAT DID YOU TO MY DADDY!"_

_"SHUT IT KID!…im going to enjoy killing you too….." came the cold voice. It froze the child in place. A distant 'BANG" was heard and a flash of light illuminated the room. Thunderstorm….._

_The few seconds of granted light gave Ukitake the opportunity to see the man on the floor, the father…the light shone upon his face for a second. It left him numb. _

_The dying man on the ground was himself…Ukitake Juushirou…_

_It was then that he realized it was a memory. A memory..and the man..himself…was a father..then who was the kid, he had a child?_

_He looked around a found the weeping child still clinging to his father, staring at the figure with the knife.._

_"Run…run, save yourself! I will always be there to watch over you, give you candy, me and your mother…now RUN!" barked the dying man's last breath left him._

_His son, the child no older then 5, still crying, took a katana from the wall._

_"I…dad never wanted me to use this, he never knew I watched him train…daddy, I am sorry, I can run away!"_

_Another flash of lightning and the boy lunged at the man…_

_A scream later the boy was a bloody heap on the ground, pierced as well._

_Ukitake thought his heart stopped. His son!_

_BANG! Another strike of lightning, right into the room. The murdered was long gone….the only ones left were the dead father….and the boy._

_He looked at the child. His eyes widened._

BANG!

He shot up from the couch, panting. It was a thunderstorm, in real. It was dark outside and the occasional flicker of light made him flinch. He had died in a thunderstorm, trying to protect his son.

His son….

Toushiro!

He jumped over to the small taichou, who had fallen asleep on his paperwork. But what worried him were the occasional whimpers coming from him. His body was shaking…

Without hesitating, he scooped the boy in his arms and hugged him tightly, whispering soothing words in his ear. The dream made his memory clear..he remembered his life, his wife that died in childbirth, his only son that inherited his looks, but had her eyes, his son, that she had proudly named Toushiro, to match his own and have her own Shiro-chans in the house….

He felt the boy relax. He was waking up.

"Forgive me Toshi…..i had forgotten…but"

"Dad… you handn't" came a small voice. Ukitake looked at the child in his arms. He was smiling, even if his eyes were closed. "You gave me candy…plus you were there for me since I came here.."

This didn't make Ukitake feel better, but he managed a small smile as lay on the wooden floor. Toushiro was curled up half on his stomach, half on the wood. For the first time in his many years since he died, Ukitake Juuushirou was truly content and happy. He had found his son..and he was going to spoil him with candy more then ever. With that thought, he slowly went to sleep, imagining Shunsui's face when he will tell him tomorrow.

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><p>please review ^^ i hadnt written in a while. hope you enjoyed this.<p> 


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